thoughtbubble
Favorite quotes:
"If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you."

Anonymous-at least, I don't know.

Mark Twain:
"It usually takes a good three weeks to prepare for an impromptu speech."

"I have never let schooling interfere with my education.

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter, saying that I approved of it."

Reverend Spooner:
"This pie is occupewed. Let me sew you to another sheet."

"It is now cistomary to cuss the bride."

"Our Lord is a Shoving Leopard."

Epitaphs:

"Listen young man, as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I.
As I am now, so you will be,
so listen now, and follow me.

Response:

"To follow you I'll not consent
until I know which way you went."

Dave Barry
Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.

What's your favorite?