And the Government shall be upon Their Shoulders...
Now, schools have started banning chasing games and tag during recess, because they lead to cuts, scrapes, bruises or worse when students run into each other...
There must be a better alternative. Mom suggests that children wear rubber vests so that they just bounce off of each other if they collide.
Yes, that would do nicely. They could be advertised as Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers (say that three times real fast). Maybe parents should all get metal collars for their children that zap them when they come into hard contact with other children or objects. Yes, a child zapper is the answer. It would be quite beneficial. There would be fewer collisions because of the new careful awareness of students to avoid these run ins and the shock that comes with it. Maybe a force field is the answer. Maybe the government should get more involved in protecting kids with that technology rather than limiting their game options during recess. That way it would just be impossible for kids to collide in the first place.
Or, we could stop acting like scrapes and occasional bruises are life altering and just let kids play tag.
Now, schools have started banning chasing games and tag during recess, because they lead to cuts, scrapes, bruises or worse when students run into each other...
There must be a better alternative. Mom suggests that children wear rubber vests so that they just bounce off of each other if they collide.
Yes, that would do nicely. They could be advertised as Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers (say that three times real fast). Maybe parents should all get metal collars for their children that zap them when they come into hard contact with other children or objects. Yes, a child zapper is the answer. It would be quite beneficial. There would be fewer collisions because of the new careful awareness of students to avoid these run ins and the shock that comes with it. Maybe a force field is the answer. Maybe the government should get more involved in protecting kids with that technology rather than limiting their game options during recess. That way it would just be impossible for kids to collide in the first place.
Or, we could stop acting like scrapes and occasional bruises are life altering and just let kids play tag.
posted by hannah at 6:03 PM
2 Comments:
I think that children should be banned from playing at all. It's not just chase that ends in bruises. We should regulate what children do as individuals as well. Unsupervised minors should not be able to climb trees, or run down steep hills of grass, or especially, heaven forbid, jump on trampolines.
The government should start a task force that is charged with the sole responsibility of waging a "war on pain."
We don't call it "big brother" for nothing, do we?
At the moment I am all for banning tag. I played hall rugby a little while ago. I have a bruise on my eye from the ball, no less. It was sort of like tag, except everyone had to tag the person with the ball really hard, at the same time, and with equal and opposite forces.
Truth be told, I enjoyed it, and am rather proud of the bruise.
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